Getting a divorce isn’t easy for either spouse. As emotions fly and arguments over assets and child custody can take over both spouses’ lives, it can be difficult to remember the importance of talking with your children about what a divorce means to them. A recent article from The HuffingtonPost explored the importance of talking “to” rather than “at” your children regarding divorce.
While it’s difficult for any parent to raise an emotionally and socially well-adjusted child, it’s much more difficult when the added stress of divorce is added to the equation. Rosalind Sedacca, author of “How Do I Tell the Kids About the Divorce,” discusses the importance of having a great trust bond with children well before the stress and difficulty of divorce is being faced. Of course, spouses rarely know that divorce is on the horizon before it’s already an issue, but it’s never too late to open the lines of communication with children.
Sedacca suggests sharing feelings and experiences with life’s challenges and asking your children to do the same. She suggests that showing that you deal with fears and anxieties just as they do will help them to be more open and willing to talk. She suggests making a conscious effort to regularly and openly communicate with your children always, regardless of marital status. When difficult and stressful times hit your family, you’ll all be ready to face them together when you already have that trust in place.
Source: The HuffingtonPost, “Talk ‘To’, Not ‘At’, Your Child During and After Divorce“, Rosalind Sedacca, March 23, 2013